Clarification on "Membership Status"


Posted by Mary Pat Helbig ® , 2001/05/17, 02:03:13   Archive
Dear Friends,

I want everyone to know that I am the same Mary Pat
(Mary Pat in Ohio - PM) who used to post messages
to this BB.

On 2-9-2001, my dear husband, Dan Underwood, passed
away very unexpectedly and very suddenly. I needed
to take a brief 'vacation' from this BB to devote that
time and energy to dealing with all the details,
paperwork, phone calls, etc., etc., which seem to take
twice as long and twice the energy than I had
expecting.

This was all complicated by the fact that Dan did
not leave a will nor did he ever discuss his burial
preferences with me or his children. Dan did not
have life insurance, but I had a small policy for
him through my employer. We had a traditional
in-ground burial. Dan didn't leave any unpaid
bills, so I'm very thankful for that.

Now I'm beginning to gather information on past
employers to determine if Dan left any funds in
vested pension accounts. I've already had
positive news from a couple of the employers.

I'm starting to get out from under the piles of paper,
but the past three months have been exhausting. I'm
doing fairly well emotionally, but physically, things
have been a challenge. Lately, insomnia and fatigue,
swollen glands and sore throat, more intense aches
and pains, fever (or hot flashes?), have set in. My
doctor is doing tests - I may have mononeucleosis
and hope to get the results one way or the other on
Friday.

Meanwhile, I had my annual evaluation at work on
Tuesday. (My supervisor has been terrific throughout
the past 3 months.) She mentioned that I look and
seem so tired, etc., and suggested taking a leave
to rest up. I'm pretty sure I'll be doing that -
perhaps starting Memorial Day week and continuing for several weeks. I actually slept better last night
after I admitted to myself how weary I am.

Life does go on, and I'm getting a lot of support
from my family, friends, and colleagues at work.

But, I have been missing all of you, too, because no-
one understands myositis better than this group. It's
good to be back.

Gentle hugs,
Mary Pat in Ohio (PM)


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Replies to this message


Re: Clarification on "Membership Status"


Re: Clarification on "Membership Status" -- Mary Pat Helbig
Posted by KAREN c pm ® , 2001/05/26, 20:36:49 Top of Thread Archive
Mary Pat, I am sorry, for the passing of your husband..I am glad you are back... I hope you are not flaring. I really don't remember too much, in short term as of the moment, so excuse, the belated condolences. Take care of you, and we are always here for you,,, hugs Karen

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Re: Clarification on "Membership Status"


Re: Clarification on "Membership Status" -- Mary Pat Helbig
Posted by KAREN c pm ® , 2001/05/18, 22:18:17 Top of Thread Archive
Mary Pat, i am very sorry at the passing of your husband. I am glad you are back with us and take care of that mono if it is that, You take care of you.. we love you, Hugs and love Karen

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Re: Clarification on "Membership Status"


Re: Clarification on "Membership Status" -- Mary Pat Helbig
Posted by Jan/PM ® , 2001/05/17, 17:22:55 Top of Thread Archive
Hi Mary Pat-

We never forgot you just wanted to give you time to heal at your own pace.But I'm glad your back.

Have you ever been tested for sjogren's syndrome? It can certainly cause swollen glands and can be secondary to the poly.

You are a brave lady but you've had a lot to deal with even if you weren't ill. You have always helped us and hopefully we can do the same.

Welcome back.

Jan

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Re: Re: Clarification on "Membership Status"


Re: Re: Clarification on "Membership Status" -- Jan/PM
Posted by Mary Pat Helbig ® , 2001/05/18, 12:37:35 Top of Thread Archive
Dear Jan,

I've never been tested for sjogren's syndrome but will
certainly ask my rheumy about it when we talk - which
will probably be today since I need a doctor's note to
have medical leave approved.

If, for some reason, my rheumy does not write a note,
and I can't take *medical* leave, I can still take
time off as *personal* leave. The difference is that
on medical leave, my employer continues to pay 85% of
my health insurance and I continue to pay the other 15%
- a modest $30 a month on my part. If I take personal
leave, I have to pay the entire amount = approximately
$200 per month.

(This has never made sense to me since both medical and
personal leaves are unpaid, and who can afford to pay
out $200/month for health insurance when you have no
income???)

Either way, my time off would be covered under the
federal Family Leave Act, which means that when I come
back to work, I'm guaranteed the same or a job with
equivalent pay and similar responsibilities.

I'm not very worried about being replaced in my job
while I am on leave since I have 14+ years experience
in the same position. But, even if my job were to be
abolished, my employer, The Ohio State University,
would have to guarantee me an equivalent position when
I return from leave under the Family Leave Act
regulations.

Unfortunately, Ohio State is facing a budget battle
in the state legislature over the next couple of months.
We are already operating with a freeze on advertising
job vacancies and on hiring. Layoffs might be the next
step if the legislature continues its past behavior by
cutting state funds for all state-assisted higher
education schools in the state.

As it is, Ohio ranks 41st out of all 50 states in terms
of funding for state-assisted institutions. This means
that only 9 other states in the nation have a worse
record than Ohio for funding of higher education.

Given the demise of the steel industry in Ohio,
especially in my hometown of Youngstown, and the sharp
decrease in manufacturing jobs as these are moved out
of the U.S., higher education in Ohio should be a
priority in the state legislature, not an afterthought.
Too many highly skilled workers are now in minimum pay
jobs because they "only" have a high school diploma.
Only 17% of Ohio's population ever receives a degree
in higher education.

The state should be pushing people of all ages into
college to keep up with the demands of the high-tech
companies which are sprouting up all over the state.
Instead, the state legislature keeps cutting funding
for higher education. Phooey. :(

Well, I'll get down off my soapbox now.

Thank you, Jan, and everyone else for a warm welcome
back to the BB. It's bigger and better than ever
thanks to Jim's vision and Kelly's hard work!

Gentle hugs,
Mary Pat in Ohio (PM)


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Re: Re: Re: Clarification on "Membership Status"


Re: Re: Re: Clarification on "Membership Status" -- Mary Pat Helbig
Posted by Jan/PM ® , 2001/05/18, 17:19:19 Top of Thread Archive
Hi Mary Pat-

The board is excellent.Jim and Kelly have done a great job with it.The newsletter,book sales,and support group keep our Jim hopping to keep up with it all but he has a big heart.

You've certainly had to plunge back into the working world.The recession??(they can't seem to decide),plunging stock market,down turn of manufacturing,and job lay offs are making things rough for lots of folks.Greenspans interest rate drops have not made the market bounce back as they hoped.The tech stocks have seen the bottom drop out but it was inflated and over due for a correction.

This disease forced me to quit working over 10 years ago.We never know what may happen and sure need to check insurances and wills when we can do it at our leisure not under the stress of a crisis.Woman need to keep a hand in the finances,so their able to deal with it themselves.

I hope you get answers at your doctors appointment.Was it you that use to always exercise in a heated pool and felt it kept you going or was that Mev? Anyway,best of luck at your doctors.

Jan

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Re: Clarification on "Membership Status"


Re: Clarification on "Membership Status" -- Mary Pat Helbig
Posted by Ann ibm ny ® , 2001/05/17, 15:59:14 Top of Thread Archive
hi...and we've missed you..maybe knowing you could take a leave let you relax more..all that paperwork etc. and decision making is hard to deal with under the best of health circumstances..so rest up on your break and take care of you...regards Ann

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Re: Clarification on "Membership Status"


Re: Clarification on "Membership Status" -- Mary Pat Helbig
Posted by James R. Kilpatrick ® , 2001/05/17, 02:19:28 Top of Thread Archive
Dear Mary Pat -

You had told me some of what you were going through immediate after your husband died, I've thought of all you were having to go through with the legalities.

I know how the Ohio laws are because my sister-in-law died in Cincinnati instantly. She had a will that left the home to us, but no one could find the will - so you know what that meant - SELL & divide among her brothers & sisters.

My wife was beneficiary to several insurance policies and bonds, thank the Lord, or the State would have gotten half of that too.

You're a strong individual, Mary Pat. You have helped countless people via bulletin boards. We are here to help and comfort you anyway you allow us. We're mighty pleased to have you back. - Jim and Kelly and Lucille

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